Update and Excuses

A mundane update approaches!

And a discussion of excuses.

The excuse to post: It was my friend SQ's birthday picnic the other day!

The real reason: I have an odd obsession with blogging

The excuse for the real reason: It really helps me write things down and sort out my thoughts, and deal with life a little bit better

The ulterior motive: It's a nice procrastination tool.

Happy birthday SQ!

The picnic itself was really enjoyable! Half of the people there I don't see often (last time was usually last year, actually) so a perk is being able to see all these familiar faces once again.

Y'know, at graduation, it felt like the whole experience of high-school was over and everything was ending. It was almost as if everything that happened was gone forever. But in hindsight, not really. Although technically 'high school' is over, the future brings more, too.

Catch-up was nice, and a lot of laughs. It was truly a great day for a picnic just to chill around and relax. Afterwards I went to a Russell Peter's comedy show, which was heaps great as well (I haven't laughed so hard in a long time; my diaphragm was pretty tired by the end of it all).

What I really wanted to discuss in this post was the topic of excuses.

Initially I was going to write this 'update' post a day or two after the picnic itself, which would have made sense. But halfway through writing it I... lost motivation and just deleted everything.

I made up the excuse that 'no one reads it anyway' and a bunch of other useless justifications that really just made me feel even worse than I already did.

Recently I've thought about the topic of 'excuses' a bit more than I usually do. Although excuses can be justified sometimes (surely), more often than not, they're just weak arguments to try and cover up for our own lazyness and fear.

Sometimes it takes a lot of drive and courage to actually decide on something and actually do it.

I'm not sure where this post is going. The idea for this post kind of popped into my head whilst I was on the bus home. The reason for that was because earlier today a friend at Uni pointed out they found my blog, and I started to question my motives for posting.

I used to just post for my own enjoyment, but with the most recent post (that I then deleted and didn't end up publishing) I realised that my excuse was weak. I didn't want to post for a variety of reasons, but most of all I think it was because I 'just wasn't feeling it'.

Oh my god I actually don't know where this post is going. It's really just a mesh of thoughts. Apologies.

Life's been pretty all over the place recently. A lot to deal with, and I think most of all is the fact that I'm so unsure how to feel about certain aspects in my life (not to mention upcoming exams!!!). The transition between high-school/holiday life to Medicine is really happening fast, and it's taking its toll. I wasn't in the best of moods the past few days, and there are an accumulation of reasons for that, which aren't fit for discussion right here and now, but as always, we'll deal with it.

Life gets hard but it goes on, too!

"The best thing about a storm is that it passes, eventually."

-- a paraphrased quote from somewhere

What am I trying to say? I don't know

Don't worry too much about what others think and just do things because you want to do them. Find the drive and motivation from deep down within and use your life to do things for yourself. Whether that be studying, catching up with friends, singing badly but loudly, blogging, or whatever sees you fit. Don't fall back on excuses. Embrace life as it goes fast, as it goes slow, as it gets hard, and as it gets easier.

This was a pointless post. I promise a more interesting post (photoshoot!) within... A week. 99.87% chance success rate.

I'll end with this picture.

Yes, these shrimps were on the barbie.

A'ight. Peace out.

MedShave and Photography

So with (almost) a month of Uni finishing up, I think I'm starting to get used to things.

Don't get me wrong -- everything's still everywhere and there is quite a large amount of chaos. But I feel like I've been starting to get things sorted. Slightly.

Recently I even managed to take photos for some University events for Medicine, which has been super sweet.

I finally feel like I'm getting into the vibe of things, and finally starting to get back into photography as a documentary form. It's been a while, and it feels good to do it again!

This time the event was Be Brave and Shave!

[A limit on the number of photos posted here, but if you'd like to see the rest, check out this link here]

Got some really nice shots, and it was really great to finally get back into the groove of this. It's been a long time and I've almost forgotten what it even feels like to have this responsibility.

It just hit me halfway through taking photos that... I don't know. It was just a weird feeling to realise that I'm 'doing this again'. The feeling was so oddly familiar and recognisable, yet it felt like it was such a long time since I'd done it.

Half of the people I didn't know the names of, let alone even seen them around Uni. I'm sure that they didn't know who I was, either. Yet, it sort of all fell into place. I suppose there's a part of being a photographer that makes you do that -- you just jump in without thinking. The most important thing is getting the shot and capturing what the atmosphere of the moment. Often that involves blocking the view of people, getting down on one knee or other difficult positions, and overcoming any sense of social anxiety.

It felt good.

Although I'm still a lowly fresher, it felt really nice to finally have some responsibility and know what I'm doing (in contrast to the usual confusion that I'm surrounded by). It felt great to jump in there, have a motive, and just do it (not endorsed by Nike), because that's what I'm comfortable doing.

Be brave and... wax?

I'm not sure how to put it into words accurately, or whether anyone reading this will actually understand what I'm trying to say, but I have to put it out there.

Just a quick update because it feels good to be back in business. Take care.

Med Camp, Uni, and Updates

Life has been pretty crazy of recent. Not going to lie.

There's been a big change in a lot of things -- constant schedule changes, new faces and names, completely alternative expectations of basically everything.

It's weird how fast things changed. Three weeks ago I hadn't a clue of what University would be like. And then in a matter of three weeks time, we were all dumped into the deep end head-first.

Though, I exaggerate. It's been a fairly nice transition (which is still on-going).

It took a while to settle in, but I feel that I've really started to enjoy Uni and appreciate it.

Though high-school is but a distant memory, full of comfort and safety, I can say confidently that I wouldn't want to go back. I'm loving University -- though it is a challenge, it's a great place to be.

I've been quite busy of late, with a huge variety of things. That includes things like Med Camp, assignments, keeping up with Uni content, work, meeting new people, and photography.

It's meant that I've had to cut back on a lot of things, including table tennis and reading (oh no), and also a lot less 'casual' time. Instead, the three hours of public transport every day has sucked it all up.

Life's a bit all over the place, but I'm managing! And I'm learning. I feel like this entire thing has made me more independent (though, I've still got a far way to go).

Anyway, enough waffling on about my life.

Med-camp was a blast! Definitely no regrets going. I felt like I learned a lot about myself and about other people, and just really was able get to know them and make a few new friends.

Was a pretty good learning experience, in more ways than one (less on the academic side, more on the social side)

Trivia; We were the Carpel group.
Sadly, didn't win, but I like to think that we had the best time. It's all in the wrist, anyway.

Although the place we stayed at had pretty poor accommodation (the bathrooms were terrifying!), it was a really beautiful place. The landscape was gorgeous.

I do somewhat regret not taking as many photos as I'd liked to. I suppose the reason for that is because they had official photographers there, and also I wanted to just enjoy the time and experience myself, without having to worry about my camera.

It was a nice time.

Anyway, life is getting a bit busy, and no guarantees of next post, but I do have a few things planned sometime along the track.

Till then, a la prochaine!

Filter (Feeding)

To anyone who is confused about the title or missed the pun; filter-feeders are a group of animals that feed by straining their food through a filtering structure in their body, quite like the name suggests.

Hey, the more you know.

Anyway, to unwind a bit and to bond with my brother (and to also get my hand into photography again), we hit up the usual -- the park down the road that so frequently becomes our 'chill spot'.

After inspiration from the UNSW PhotoSoc talk on Friday, I was itching to donate some time out of my 'should-be-studying' resource and use it wisely.

Whilst editing, I stumbled across some filters that were pre-embedded into Lightroom. I'd seen them before, but never really clicked on them or experimented, because I usually use my photos to document (which often means more 'realistic' appearances, though this is only the general case).

This time I thought I'd give a few of them a spin, just to add an extra dimension to my photos.

Trust me, it's incredibly hard to take photos AND sit on a see-saw at the same time.

In the last few months I've also taken a step to teach my brother how to take photographs. At the very least, he knows how to operate my camera (limited to basics, but that's a start for a young child).

His knowledge isn't extensive, of course, and post-editing makes it easier to fix a few compositional errors, but overall, he's made a start, and so I'm proud already.

More pre-set filters, with a bit of personalised tweaking.

I can't help but feel like I'm treading on thin ice here. I don't want to scare my brother off photography, because it's something I love and I wish he will eventually experience sometime in the future (even if it's just a try). I suppose I'm afraid that I'll accidentally impose my hobby onto him, and pressure him into it all. I don't want it to become something that he considers a 'chore', or something that he feels pressured to do, because that's not what it should be; photography should be enjoyed and ought to be a passion.

In the meantime, I think he's alright with it. He doesn't complain when I hand the camera to him, and he does seem to place effort and some level of thought into his photographs (though, you can't expect much from a nine year old).

Perks is that I no longer need a tripod! Hehe

But, in the end, more photos of my brother were taken than of myself, for obvious reasons.

I think I can say in full confidence that my brother dominates a lot of my photographs. Back when I was an avid user of Picasso (which would identify and sort faces, categorising them into names), I recall I had over six hundred photos of my brother. That was in 2013. I don't even want to think of the number it's at now. (No wonder my hard-drives fill up so quickly...)

I wish I still had baby-soft skin like him

Smiles all around.

I've mentioned it before, but I really love photographing children. Their smiles are so natural and full of joy. They can actually forget the world and its worries, and really enjoy being in that moment and having a slice of 'fun'.

Smiles

As we grow into adults that ability tends to fade, and we become self-conscious. When I pull my camera out to take photos of older people (i.e., 'not children'), it all seems so much more difficult. 

And of course, I can't blame them. I mean, when someone points a camera at me, I stop what I'm doing and smile directly at the lens. That's just how we're programmed, I suppose. As adults we tend to notice the camera a lot more (and, to be fair, it's difficult to completely miss seeing such a chunky, black DSLR) and thus respond appropriately. Children, I find, tend to be so focused on the experience -- completely swallowed up in the 'now' and the moment -- that they either miss the DSLR completely, or refuse to place any importance/acknowledgement of its presence.

That's why I find it infinitely easier.

Anyway, short speel (as a break from studying and sleep)

We also played javelin with a stick. It was pretty fun.
I was never good at javelin, though.

Fun day though. Great bonding time, and some experimenting with filters.

It was a reminder for myself to take a break sometimes.

And up next, JD representing Australia at the 2016 Olympic Games in Javelin

University

The University term has started, and that's signaled a new chapter in my life.

A fresh plot-line which features a confused young girl trying to make her way through a medicine course and I can assure you, it's very, very different.

Time is of consistent shortage, I waste about seventeen hours a week on public transport (yes, over three hours per day), and the new knowledge is very filling.

It's not exactly completely new, per se. It's just different from high-school. I had my fair taste of this during summer camp for ABO (Oh, the flashbacks of severe confusion!), but nonetheless it's a change that hits you square in the solar plexus -- all at once.

Fitting in isn't too hard -- it took me a few days but everything's starting to grow slightly more familiar and comfortable with each new day.

I'm not going to lie, I kind of enjoy University. I like the structure and learning more than high-school, but there are aspects of high-school that I miss. Oh well, it's all in the past! No point dwelling on it; the future awaits ahead.

Amongst the 9AM starts (that I only barely am on-time), the over-use of the Campus map, and the rush of new content, I feel like my life is slowly starting to take shape again.

I really should start on this assignment.

I don't really know what to say. I just felt like I owed an update.

Inspiration hasn't been hitting hard, though I've been willing it to. Rather, I've been plagued by thoughts trying to settle down into University and take it slow (not to mention the ever-lasting list of 'To-Dos' that seems to keep growing).

I don't even know if this post made sense. Whoops.

If time permits, I'll also chuck up a few posts on my summaries of recent travels. By that, I mean lists like 'Top 10 Places to check out in Melbourne', etc., once I find the 1) Time, and 2) Motivation to do so.

Next few weeks will be busy and I can't guarantee posts, but I do know that I have a photoshoot planned for April, which (if it comes to ripening) will be super fun to do and exciting (I anticipate).

Til then, enjoy the Autumn months and stay safe.